Barefoot Brides Read Online Free Page B

sisters about her feelings, lay out her fears and reservations, be truly and fully honest for once in her life, but…
    â€œHmm. How to describe Lionel.” Moxie tapped her chin with one finger.
    But…when everything you attempt ends in embarrassment, indifference or big, fat failure, you always keep your guard up and you never ever really feel safe.
    â€œSafe.” Jo Cromwell couldn’t even begin to imagine what that felt like.
    â€œYes! Safe,” Moxie agreed. “Now there’s the perfect word for Lionel.”
    Jo blinked, trying to make sense of the comment, but she couldn’t seem to let go of the subject of her own insecurities. How she questioned each and every single choice she made. Walked away from an encounter only to go over it in her head again and again. She tried her best. She gave her all. Yet that twisting, hot-cheeked angst always came back no matter how much of herself she put into anything, because coming from her it would be nearly worthless.
    Not to feel those things pressing in on you day in and day out must be one of the best kinds of freedom in the world, she thought. Like…
    She closed her eyes and lifted her face to draw in the smells of Florida’s Emerald Coast—the salty surf, sun-warmed skin and SPF 30. Yes, even in mid-November the scent of the protective lotion still lingered in the beach air.
    A gull cried out.
    Foamy water bathed her bare feet then retreated.
    Being safe must feel like being a wave.
    Or the wind.
    Or a bird.
    Or anything but a thirty-five-year-old failed perfectionist, buried in business debt, trying to keep the peace in a family where she had always been the kid nobody wanted.
    â€œJo? Jo? Where are you, girl?” Moxie put her hand on her sister’s shoulder.
    â€œWhere I am doesn’t seem nearly as important as where I am going.”
    Moxie stepped in close. “Where are you going? Wasn’t there something you wanted from me, something to do with forming this group of yours? What do you want to do?”
    Just once, she thought in a prayer she secretly suspected even God would dismiss, I want to do something…
    She gazed at the ocean so vast and blue that if you squinted at the horizon you couldn’t tell for sure where it left off and the sky began. She thought of pirates and maidens and missionaries both of long ago and of the very modern variety.
    She thought of her sisters and their mother, and how much healing they still had to do before they could truly be a family again.
    Jo twisted around to look back at the Traveler’s Wayside Chapel.
    She thought of Travis and how, at the height of his career as a nationally recognized sports announcer, he had walked away from the trappings of fame and money to become a minister at a broken-down chapel in the nearly forgotten former tourist town of Santa Sofia, Florida.
    And Jo?
    Just once, Lord, I would like to do something right. Something good. Something that makes a difference. Jo held her breath for a moment wondering if she had it in her to say aloud what she longed for more than anything, including her desperate need not to be taken for a fool.
    â€œI am going…” She looked at Moxie then at the sand where her own footprints had once been.
    It all became clear in that instant.
    Her life so far was not working. It was not serving the Lord. To do that she would have to step out in faith.
    She would never be able to make a difference until she started doing something different.
    â€œI am going to the chapel to help clean up after the free meals.”
    â€œOkay, I can do that with you.” Moxie took a step, leaving her mark on the beach behind her.
    â€œNo.” Jo put her hand on her sister’s arm. “I’m sorry I got you out here today, but I just realized I need to do this alone.”
    Jo looked at the chapel, the sea, the sand, her sister and made that step she felt sure would lead her in a new direction, a path she