Friendship According to Humphrey Read Online Free Page B

as usual.
    “Says you, A.J.! What do those letters stand for, anyway? Awful Jerk?”
    I crawled over to the side of the cage to see who was speaking. He was BIG-BIG-BIG for a kid. He had spiky hair and a scowl on his face.
    As Garth and A.J. bent over to help Beth pick up her books, Miss Victoria called to the back of the bus.
    “Garth and A.J., if you don’t sit down so I can get moving, I’m going to report you two.”
    “Yeah, Garth Bugwart, sit down,” the big kid sneered.
    “I’m going to tell,” Beth said softly.
    “Don’t!” A.J. whispered back. “Bean will only get worse.”
    So this was the scary Bean they were talking about!
    Beth slid into a seat with all her books. Just as A.J. stepped forward, Bean stuck his leg into the aisle. So that’s how he had tripped her! After A.J. managed to step over it, Garth and I (in my cage) were standing right next to Mr. Nasty.
    “What’s in the cage, Bugface? Your lunch?” He snorted a few times, but no one else on the bus laughed. “Or is that your girlfriend?”
    That did it! I was fighting mad. Somebody had to squeak up to this guy. “For your information, I am a male Golden Hamster. And you are one MEAN BEAN!”
    “Anybody got a mousetrap?” Bean snarled.
    “Why aren’t you guys in your seats?” Miss Victoria yelled from the front of the bus. “I’m writing you up, Garth and A.J.!”
    Garth slid into a seat next to A.J. I was about to give Miss Victoria a piece of my mind when the bus lurched forward and I had to hold on to my cage for dear life. I was sorry I’d eaten those Nutri-Nibbles just before we left.
    All week, I’d been looking forward to going home with Garth. Now, I wasn’t sure I’d ever make it there!
     
    “Friendship is one mind in two bodies.”
    Mencius, Chinese philosopher

4
    Mean Bean
    A .J.’s stop was before Garth’s. “Come on over tomorrow,” Garth told his friend. As soon as A.J. left, Garth moved up to the front of the bus to get away from Bean.
    “What part of ‘sit down’ don’t you understand, Garth?” Miss Victoria sounded pretty irritated.
    “Sorry. The cage wouldn’t fit on the seat,” he said.
    “What on earth is in there, anyway?”
    Before Garth could answer, the bus stopped in front of his house. He pulled the blanket down around my cage and hurried down the steps.
    Mrs. Tugwell was waiting in the doorway of the house. She had wavy brown hair like her son. She had glasses and freckles like her son, too. She helped him set my cage up on the family room table. Garth’s little brother, Andy, raced into the room. He had wavy brown hair, glasses and freckles, too. “Mine!” he shouted.
    “Nope. He’s mine. At least for the weekend,” said Garth.
    “Tell Andy about Humphrey,” Garth’s mom said.
    “He’s a hamster. And you have to be nice to him,” Garth explained.
    He got that right!
    “I like ham,” said Andy, rubbing his stomach. “Yum-yum!”
    I hopped onto my wheel to show Andy that a hamster wasn’t anything like a ham.
    “Wheee! Ham go ’round!” said Andy.
    Garth’s mother brought in a plate of peanut butter and crackers. Ooh, that smelled good!
    “How was school?” she asked.
    “Okay,” said Garth. “But Mom, could you say something to Bean’s mom? He’s mean to everybody on the bus.”
    “Martin Bean?” Garth’s mom sounded surprised. “Why, he’s always polite when I see him.”
    “Well, he’s not polite any other time,” Garth explained. “He tripped a girl on the bus and called everybody names.”
    “That doesn’t sound like Martin. What did the bus driver do?”
    “Nothing,” Garth answered.
    “Well, I think she should be the one to work things out,” said Mrs. Tugwell.
    “But you’re friends with Mrs. Bean!”
    “I probably won’t be if I complain about her son. Maybe if you were friendlier to him, he’d act nicer.”
    “Mom . . . ,” Garth moaned.
    “It’s worth a try,” his mom suggested.
    I had to squeak up. “He’s the Meanest Bean