Gooney Bird Is So Absurd Read Online Free Page B

unexpectedly," Gooney Bird explained.
    "And a great idea has?"
    "Yep!" said Gooney Bird with a grin. "I thought of the whole rest of the limerick. It's a eureka moment."
    "Good for you. Would you like to come to the front of the class to recite it?"
    "Yes. But wait." Gooney Bird opened the lid of her desk and rummaged inside. She took out something that looked familiar: pale green and ruffled. Today Gooney Bird's hair was not in ponytails. But she grabbed half of her red hair in one hand and pulled it through one leg hole, and then she did the same with the other half. Finally she carefully arranged the elastic waistband around her head and across her forehead. Wearing her headpiece, she went to the front of the room and recited the limerick:
There once was a teacher named Pat
Who gave up the chair where she sat.
She tried to write verse,
But it only got worse
Till she warmed up her brain with a hat.
    The class applauded. "You may borrow my hat, Mrs. Pidgeon," Gooney Bird said, "anytime you want. Or you can make your own, of course."
    "Of course," Mrs. Pidgeon said. "Next? How about each of you try using your own name in a first line? No need to write an entire limerick. Let's start with first lines. I'll walk around the class in case anyone needs help." She looked at the principal. Usually his visits to classrooms lasted only a few minutes. But Mr. Leroy had picked up a paper and pencil and it did not look as if he were planning to leave.
    For a few moments the classroom was quiet, with heads bent over, pencils moving on papers. Then, here and there, groaning started.
    "Nothing rhymes with my name!" Malcolm groaned. "Nothing!"
    Gooney Bird leaned over from her desk and whispered a suggestion. "'A boy who had triplets at home,'" she suggested. "That's a good first line, and it tells about you. It doesn't have to use your name," she said.
    "How about me? " Keiko wailed.
    Mrs. Pidgeon was headed to Keiko's desk when Gooney Bird spoke again. "I have an idea for Keiko, Mrs. Pidgeon! How about A young girl of Asian descent'? Lots of things rhyme with descent! "
    One by one, the children created their first lines. Mrs. Pidgeon wrote every one neatly on the board. Then the class added second, rhyming lines. Some were quite easy; others were very, very hard.
A boy who had triplets at home
Sometimes needed a brush and a comb
A young girl of Asian descent
Decided to live in a tent
A redhead named Gooney Bird Greene
Wore a hat that was hardly routine
There once was a dude named Tyrone
Who frequently talked on the phone
A young girl named Chelsea explained
That she liked to be out when it rained
    "Mr. Leroy?" Gooney Bird said when she noticed that the principal was still working. His tongue was wedged between his teeth. "Time to put your pencil down."
    "I'm not done," Mr. Leroy said.
    Gooney Bird looked at Mrs. Pidgeon and raised her eyebrows as if she were asking a silent question. Mrs. Pidgeon shrugged. "Let's let him continue on his own," she whispered.
    Together the class worked on the limericks they had begun while Mr. Leroy, his head bent over his paper, wrote and erased, wrote and erased. Sometimes he sighed and stared out the window.
    "He's thinking," Keiko pointed out.
    "Yes," said Gooney Bird. "Occasionally it helps to look at the sky and make your mind go blank for a minute. Why don't we all try it, because we're sort of stuck on Tyrone's limerick."
    The entire class, including Mrs. Pidgeon (but not Mr. Leroy—he was bent over his paper again), stared through the window at the sky.
    "My mind never goes blank!" Malcolm groaned. "My thoughts just keep whirling and whirling!"
    "Shhhh," said Gooney Bird. "Silence helps."
    Gradually, with breaks for staring at the sky, the class began to finish the limericks on the board. Some were very funny and made them laugh aloud. Mr. Leroy never looked up.
    "Okay, class," Mrs. Pidgeon said at last. "We

    haven't finished them all, but we did some good ones, and you got to see how limericks