Mourning Song Read Online Free Page A

did and made the dishes and flatware rattle. The sound jarred Dani’s nerves. She watched as her mother began to pace across the kitchen floor.
    “Do you think this is easy for me?” her mother asked. She didn’t wait for a reply. “Cassie’s my child. I love her. I want to keep her with me for as long as possible. Keeping her in the hospitalgives us some measure of control. Even if she has to go on life support, at least she’ll be alive.”
    Didn’t the quality of Cassie’s life count for anything? Dani wondered. It wasn’t as if she was ever going to get well. All medical science could do for her now was prolong a life of suffering and pain.
    Her mother continued to pace and talk. “I don’t make these decisions lightly, Dani. The day your father died started off like any ordinary day. I got you two girls off to school, packed his lunch, and kissed him good-bye at the back door.” She turned and stared at the door, now shut and chained against the night. “I still remember the smell of his aftershave and how the light caught on his badge. He said, ‘See you at dinner, ’ and drove away.
    “I never saw him alive again—never saw him again
ever
. The car crashed and burned, and all I was allowed to see of Matt was his coffin.”
    Dani listened, sitting so still and rigid that her back began to ache. She had known that her dad had died chasing a robbery suspect, but her mother had never discussed it with her before. And she had so few memories of him that sometimes he didn’t even seem real to her. In her mind’s eye, he was always the smiling man in the photograph that Mom kept on her dresser and in the special album that highlighted his police career.
    Her mother snapped herself out of her reverie. “Anyway, I had no control over what happened to your father. Just as I have no control over what’s going to happen to Cassie. But what I can control, I will. And keeping her on treatments, in the hospital, under close supervision, is what I plan to do.”
    “But going away for only a few days—”
    Mom shook her head fiercely. “Not even for one day. I can’t take the chance—she might take a downward turn.”
    “I still think you should ask her,” Dani insisted.
    Mom came over and tentatively reached out and touched Dani’s hair. “You’re so much like your dad. Once you get hold of an idea, you don’t let go. He was stubborn, opinionated, bull-headed—and absolutely the most wonderful man in the world. You’re wonderful too.”
    Her mother’s expression softened as she gazed down at Dani. “I know what I’m doing, honey. I know what’s best for Cassie. Please trust me.”
    Dani nodded, but only because she realized it was pointless to argue. She would never persuade her mother that a few more days of life for Cassie would not be nearly so welcome as a few days of the three of them doing something fun. Much more welcome than the controlled, gleaming world of hospitals and humming machines.

S
ix

    A s D ANI WAS walking to the bus stop, she heard a horn honk. Austin pulled alongside of her in a van and called, “Hop in.”
    She nodded and quickly got in. “Hi. Thanks for the ride. How come you’re driving the van?”
    “My car’s been acting up, and since Mom and Dad are heading to Haiti for three weeks on a mission trip, they said I could drive this.”
    “They left you totally on your own? For three weeks?”
    “Dani, we’ve lived all over the world. This town is no big deal. There are plenty of neighbors around if I need anything. But I know how tocook, clean up, and take care of things.” He flashed her a grin. “I’m an independent guy. Are you impressed, or what?”
    She rolled her eyes. “It really doesn’t bother you to stay alone?”
    “I’ve been doing it for years. When I was little and my folks were preaching in the mission field, I went with them whenever I could, but as I got older, I didn’t always go.”
    “You’re lucky that you’ve gotten to travel so