Ornamental Danger: a holiday short story (Working Stiff Mysteries) Read Online Free Page A
Author: Kerri Nelson
—Mandy's favorite quote from Aunt Patty.
Between bites of corn, it had suddenly become clear to me that the board contained not a list of competitors but suspects in the death of Verna Strength.
"No. Oh, no you don't. Nuh-uh. No way. Nada. Zilch. Forget it." I shook my head as I sank into a kitchen chair.
"Mandy. Don't be so disagreeable. You know you did such a great job with that whole dead body in the freezer case over the summer. This is much easier. I mean, we know who the body belongs to, and we know the motive. Now all we need is opportunity. And that's what we have the board here for. We are gonna hash this sucker out while we stuff ourselves with food. I know how you think better on a full stomach." Ms. Lanier's words came out in a rush. She finally paused for a much needed breath.
Ms. Maimie chimed in as I paused my disagreement to stuff my mouth with a bite of roast beef. "Yeah, Mandy. It will be just like last time, but we'll skip a few steps in between and just get to the solution. We don't have time for too much investigating. The competition is tomorrow night."
I swallowed down the meat and chased it with a bite of roll—well half the roll really—and managed to help it clear my throat by taking a large swig of iced tea. I glanced over at Paget who was curled up on the sofa watching a home shopping channel and eating her food as if all was right with the world.
"First of all…we don't even know that a crime was committed. Ty is still checking into Ms. Strength's death. For all we know it may not even be a homicide."
"Yes. I'm afraid it is, dear." Ms. Lanier joined me at the table. As she sat down, I noticed the frailty of her movements. Had she just started moving so slowly or was I just now noticing? I tried to shrug off the worry as soon as it started to creep up my spine. I simply couldn't consider losing another person I cared about again so soon. I, like Paget, was still reeling from the loss of Aunt Patty.
"So, Ty told you that it was murder?" I remembered that Sundae had come over to watch Paget because Ms. Lanier had been called down to the station earlier that afternoon.
She looked down at her fingernails as they clicked on the table top and then back up at me. "Well, he didn't say that exactly…but…"
"Wait." I held out my hand, palm facing her in a signal to stop. "I don't want to know. I want to stay out of it. I'm trying to just keep my nose out of other people's business and do my job. Or jobs."
"Well, that's where we need you in play, dear. You are working for that ornery old Coach Mulder, and he had a real bone to pick with Verna Strength. I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't come storming into her house and threaten her. Poor old bat wouldn't have stood a chance with that ogre." Ms. Maimie took the reins and tried to steer me back to their ongoing investigation.
"That's right," Ms. Lanier perked up. "If you'll just check into Coach Mulder's whereabouts and so forth…we will check into the other two. We think we have it narrowed down, and we don't have much time. We need to just get this settled before the ballots are tallied tomorrow night. We can't have a murderer win the trophy—it just wouldn't be right."
I took a deep breath and blew it out of my temporarily empty mouth. Slow deep breaths.
"Ladies. I don't want to get involved. Let's let Ty handle this. I've got enough problems. My house looks like a bakery on steroids and a funeral home running a special on coffin flowers. I'm absolutely overrun with gifts from these folks who are entering the contest. I just want to get done with this Glitter Queen thing and get back to my life. I want Paget and me to have a nice, calm Christmas."
"We want that too, sweetie. That's why we've created The Hoots." Ms. Maimie said as she spun her eye glasses around in one hand by the stem.
Ms. Lanier clapped her hands together and let out a "woot woot" sound. "Yep, the old Hoots are on the case. We will solve this in time for the
Between bites of corn, it had suddenly become clear to me that the board contained not a list of competitors but suspects in the death of Verna Strength.
"No. Oh, no you don't. Nuh-uh. No way. Nada. Zilch. Forget it." I shook my head as I sank into a kitchen chair.
"Mandy. Don't be so disagreeable. You know you did such a great job with that whole dead body in the freezer case over the summer. This is much easier. I mean, we know who the body belongs to, and we know the motive. Now all we need is opportunity. And that's what we have the board here for. We are gonna hash this sucker out while we stuff ourselves with food. I know how you think better on a full stomach." Ms. Lanier's words came out in a rush. She finally paused for a much needed breath.
Ms. Maimie chimed in as I paused my disagreement to stuff my mouth with a bite of roast beef. "Yeah, Mandy. It will be just like last time, but we'll skip a few steps in between and just get to the solution. We don't have time for too much investigating. The competition is tomorrow night."
I swallowed down the meat and chased it with a bite of roll—well half the roll really—and managed to help it clear my throat by taking a large swig of iced tea. I glanced over at Paget who was curled up on the sofa watching a home shopping channel and eating her food as if all was right with the world.
"First of all…we don't even know that a crime was committed. Ty is still checking into Ms. Strength's death. For all we know it may not even be a homicide."
"Yes. I'm afraid it is, dear." Ms. Lanier joined me at the table. As she sat down, I noticed the frailty of her movements. Had she just started moving so slowly or was I just now noticing? I tried to shrug off the worry as soon as it started to creep up my spine. I simply couldn't consider losing another person I cared about again so soon. I, like Paget, was still reeling from the loss of Aunt Patty.
"So, Ty told you that it was murder?" I remembered that Sundae had come over to watch Paget because Ms. Lanier had been called down to the station earlier that afternoon.
She looked down at her fingernails as they clicked on the table top and then back up at me. "Well, he didn't say that exactly…but…"
"Wait." I held out my hand, palm facing her in a signal to stop. "I don't want to know. I want to stay out of it. I'm trying to just keep my nose out of other people's business and do my job. Or jobs."
"Well, that's where we need you in play, dear. You are working for that ornery old Coach Mulder, and he had a real bone to pick with Verna Strength. I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't come storming into her house and threaten her. Poor old bat wouldn't have stood a chance with that ogre." Ms. Maimie took the reins and tried to steer me back to their ongoing investigation.
"That's right," Ms. Lanier perked up. "If you'll just check into Coach Mulder's whereabouts and so forth…we will check into the other two. We think we have it narrowed down, and we don't have much time. We need to just get this settled before the ballots are tallied tomorrow night. We can't have a murderer win the trophy—it just wouldn't be right."
I took a deep breath and blew it out of my temporarily empty mouth. Slow deep breaths.
"Ladies. I don't want to get involved. Let's let Ty handle this. I've got enough problems. My house looks like a bakery on steroids and a funeral home running a special on coffin flowers. I'm absolutely overrun with gifts from these folks who are entering the contest. I just want to get done with this Glitter Queen thing and get back to my life. I want Paget and me to have a nice, calm Christmas."
"We want that too, sweetie. That's why we've created The Hoots." Ms. Maimie said as she spun her eye glasses around in one hand by the stem.
Ms. Lanier clapped her hands together and let out a "woot woot" sound. "Yep, the old Hoots are on the case. We will solve this in time for the
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