Secrets of a Soap Opera Diva Read Online Free Page A

him the way he tolerated me, one day at a time.
    “Huh?” I asked groggily, forgetting I’d tucked myself in with a bottle of Moët and a tin of Godiva. I attempted to hold the phone to my throbbing head, CNN’s Nancy Grace blaring in the background.
    “Those quotes you gave Morelli,” Weezi reminded me. “You’ve caused a goddamn firestorm. The network is pissed and so is the show!”
    “Oh . . . that?” Hadn’t thought much about my conversation with Mitch until that very moment. “Maybe I went a little overboard, I was fired up. It’ll blow over.”
    “A
little
overboard? Your stunt is being talked about all over the place.
Cliffhanger Weekly
,
Soap Suds Digest
, SecretsofaSoapOperaDiva.com,
Daytime Confidential
. . . you name it. And not just soap press,
Access Hollywood,
Nelson Branco,
even Perez!”
    “Wow, Perez? I finally made it.”
    “This isn’t funny and it ain’t good,” Weezi griped. “The network’s scrambling. A reporter from
Black Enterprise
has already requested an interview with you and the WBC’s head of diversity, Josephine Mansoor, concerning alleged unfair practices on your soap.”
    “Oh boy,” I said, sitting up, clearing hair out of my eyes.
    “You’ve caused quite the commotion.”
    “And that’s a bad thing? You know how many times I’ve been up for that doggone Sudsy. If it sheds some light on this screwed-up, narrow-minded industry, good.”
    “Calysta . . .”
    “Thanks for the wake-up call, I have thirty-three pages today.”
    “You mean thirteen.”
    “No, I mean what I said, thirty-three. If only I got paid by the page like that diva in Britain.”
    “Calysta . . .”
    “I know, keep dreaming. Later, Weezi.”
    I hung up and dialed Grandma Jones.
    “Hey baby,” she replied on the second ring as usual. “What’s wrong?”
    “How’d you know?”
    “It’s six thirty in the morning out there in Hollywoodland and you’re supposed to be gettin’ ready to tape my
story
.”
    “Grandma, I swear the devil’s at my heels. I have
had
it!”
    “What happen’ this time? And before you start, Beulah, I hope you didn’t go ’n’ pop that Gina Chiccetelli in the lip even though I don’t like how she’s been tryin’ to take your man again.”
    “Grandma, first of all, that’s her storyline, second, she’s paid to be a floozy. And third, no, I didn’t go ’n’ pop Gina in the lip. It’s worse than that.”
    “Beulah, ain’t nothin’ God and your grandma can’t fix; now you tell me with a quickness what’s goin’ on out there!”
    I hated my birth name, Beulah Espinetta, with a passion. I changed it the moment I boarded the train from Greenwood to New York City with blurred stars in my eyes, twenty years earlier.
    “I didn’t win the Sudsy again, Grandma.”
    “ Is that all?” She dismissed me. “Sugah, that’s yesterday’s news. Been knowin’ since last night, but wasn’t gonna bring it up ’cause I know how you let that mess bring you down. But you sure did hold your own, Beulah, I don’t care what anybody says. Made me just as proud, the way you held up your head even though you didn’t win and kept right on smilin’, blowin’ kisses into the camera and everything, and I know that was just for me. You gave new meanin’ to ‘Folks push you back only as far as you let ’em.’ Made
all
of Greenwood feel good, sure did.”
    “What?”
    “Chile, I had the whole neighborhood over here. You coulda’ canceled Christmas. Couldn’t tell a soul you wasn’t gonna win that Sudsy. No sah-ree. Sister Whilemina made fried chicken and greens, Miss Bessie made mac and cheese, and I made my monkey bread and a Sock-It-To-Me
cake that wouldn’t quit. Tongues was lickin’ brains, baby . . . lickin’ brains. Plus I made my special Manischewitz punch with bananas to wash everything down real good.”
    It was bad enough that I’d lost, but to find out the whole town was watching!
    “ Chile, folks was yellin’ at the television somethin’