almost wept when I saw the thin foam mattress I'd almost died on. Pride fled and I staggered into the room, collapsing face first on to it. His feet stopped in front of me.
I muttered, "Get out."
He squatted and grabbed my chin, forcing me to look at him. I stared up, the edges of my vision frosted with pain and exhaustion. He said, "Please, let me help you."
"Please stop touching me."
"Fine, I won't touch you. But...I can't leave you like this."
I laughed a hollow, ugly sound. "Worried you might kill me before you've squeezed all your revenge out? Gonna watch her beat me again?"
His laugh echoed mine. Bitter, twisted sounds full of hate. I wondered if my agony echoed up the link, or if he felt any of it at all. He was human after all. Meli and I hadn't gotten to talk much, but it seemed like mostly all she felt was lust.
I closed my eyes. The fight had gone out of me, and pain overpowered me. The seconds stretched into days as he stood over me. He kept his word, he didn't touch me, but he fiddled with another of the devices at his belt. Was he going to finish the job with a whip of his own? Instead a cool mist settled over my back and took the worst of the pain with it.
Lethargy swept into pain's place and I could barely keep my eyes open. I almost wept at the relief.
I could hear the frustration in his voice. "It won't stop the scarring, if you don't let me put the salve on, but you should at least be able to sleep. We don't have the advanced medicine and medbots you’re used to, I'm sure. Frontier medicine. Let me help you."
I gathered the energy to shake my head and whispered, "no." I couldn't let him touch me. I was so far gone for him already, I couldn't bear to lose any more of myself to the Pogona . I remembered my mother with my father, nothing else existed except him. Not her friends. Certainly not her children.
I drifted into darkness, letting sleep claim me as he stood watching.
Chapter Six
I was lying on a fluffy cloud, the sun beating down on me. Warmth was all around me and I arched my back and stretched out.
I awoke with a horrifying scream. Stretching caused my back to light up into a thousand different points of pain. The shredded fabric was stuck to the dried blood and any movement caused a different agony.
He was standing beside me again.
"Goddammit, why did I listen to you?"
The soothing mist fell on my back again, chasing the pain away. Superficially, at least. Any movement caused the fabric to touch the now gaping wounds and I panted shallowly.
He knelt beside me and I pressed my face against his knee as he sponged something on my back.
"I have to cut this off. Idiot. We're both idiots."
He slowly wet each strip of fabric until it came loose from my skin. He sprayed it again and said, "This part is gonna suck. Would have been less awful last night."
And he scrubbed the ten wounds clean as I pressed my face against his knee.
Finally, he stopped and began slowly rubbing the salve I'd refused last night into my back. The pain fled, replaced by a more insidious feeling. My nipples went rock hard and moisture pooled between my legs. His hands lingered. I knew my desire for him echoed down the link he didn't even know existed.
But I couldn't make him stop, and I moaned against his knee. The sound broke the spell the touch of our skin wove, and he jerked his hands away. He pried my hand off his leg and backed away from me.
I heard him mutter under his breath, "This doesn't make sense. Why do I want to touch her?"
He kicked a tray closer to my hand and said louder, "Eat. You'll need your strength to heal." Then he strode out of the room. I gnawed on the tough lump that rested in front of me.
It seemed like some sort of flavorless nutri-loaf they fed the military on short rations. No fluffy delicious bread or even vitae. I choked down about half of it before I gave up and closed my