The Power of Silence Read Online Free Page A

of his outer appearance were astonishing," don Juan went
on, "the changes of mood and behavior that accompanied each transformation
were even more astonishing. For example, when he was a fat young man, he was
jolly and sensual. When he was a skinny old man, he was petty and vindictive.
When he was a fat old man, he was the greatest imbecile there was."
    "Was
he ever himself?" I asked.
    "Not
the way I am myself," he replied. "Since I'm not interested in
transformation I am always the same. But he was not like me at all." Don
Juan looked at me as if he were assessing my inner strength. He smiled, shook
his head from side to side and broke into a belly laugh.
    "What's
so funny, don Juan?" I asked.
    "The
fact is that you're still too prudish and stiff to appreciate fully the nature
of my benefactor's transformations and their total scope," he said.
"I only hope that when I tell you about them you don't become morbidly
obsessed."
    For some
reason I suddenly became quite uncomfortable and had to change the subject.
"Why are the naguals called 'benefactors' and not simply teachers?" I
asked nervously. "Calling a nagual a benefactor is a gesture his
apprentices make," don Juan said. "A nagual creates an overwhelming
feeling of gratitude in his disciples. After all, a nagual molds them and guides
them through unimaginable areas."
    I remarked
that to teach was in my opinion the greatest, most altruistic act anyone could
perform for another.
    "For
you, teaching is talking about patterns," he said. "For a sorcerer,
to teach is what a nagual does for his apprentices. For them he taps the
prevailing force in the universe: intent - the force that changes and reorders
things or keeps them as they are. The nagual formulates, then guides the
consequences that that force can have on his disciples. Without the nagual's
molding intent there would be no awe, no wonder for them. And his apprentices,
instead of embarking on a magical journey of discovery, would only be learning
a trade: healer, sorcerer, diviner, charlatan, or whatever."
    "Can
you explain intent to me?" I asked.
    "The
only way to know intent" he replied, "is to know it directly through
a living connection that exists between intent and all sentient beings.
Sorcerers call intent the indescribable, the spirit, the abstract, the nagual.
I would prefer to call it nagual, but it overlaps with the name for the leader,
the benefactor, who is also called nagual, so I have opted for calling it the spirit,
intent, the abstract."
    Don Juan
stopped abruptly and recommended that I keep quiet and think about what he had
told me. By then it was very dark. The silence was so profound that instead of
lulling me into a restful state, it agitated me. I could not maintain order in
my thoughts. I tried to focus my attention on the story he had told me, but
instead I thought of everything else, until finally I fell asleep.

 
2. - The Impeccability Of The
Nagual Elias
    I had no
way of telling how long I slept in that cave. Don Juan's voice startled me and
I awoke. He was saying that the first sorcery story concerning the
manifestations of the spirit was an account of the relationship between intent
and the nagual. It was the story of how the spirit set up a lure for the nagual,
a prospective disciple, and of how the nagual had to evaluate the lure before
making his decision either to accept or reject it. It was very dark in the
cave, and the small space was confining. Ordinarily an area of that size would
have made me claustrophobic, but the cave kept soothing me, dispelling my
feelings of annoyance. Also, something in the configuration of the cave
absorbed the echoes of don Juan's words.
    Don Juan
explained that every act performed by sorcerers, especially by the naguals, was
either performed as a way to strengthen their link with intent or as a response
triggered by the link itself. Sorcerers, and specifically the naguals,
therefore had to be actively and permanently on the lookout for