seen the truth.â
This was beyond my understanding. I could only think of being taken from him and I could visualize no greater calamity. He was aware of my concern and was my loving father immediately.
âThere. I have frightened you. There is nothing to fear. Anything but that. I shall see you . . . as always. I would agree to anything rather than that they should take you from me.â
âWho would take me from you? The King, my uncle?â
âHe says it would be for the sake of the country . . . for the sake of peace. He says, why do I not keep these matters private? Why do I flaunt them? But you must not bother your little head . . .â
I said firmly: âMy head is not little and I want to bother it.â
He laughed and seemed suddenly to change his tone.
âIt is nothing . . . nothing at all. Bishop Compton will be here to instruct you in the faith you must follow, according to the laws of the country and the command of the King. You must listen to the Bishop and be a good little member of the Church of England. Compton and I have never been great friends, but that is of no moment. He is a hard-working fellow and has the Kingâs favor. He will do his duty.â
âIf he is not your friend . . .â
âOh, it was a long-ago quarrel. He had the temerity to dismiss a man who acted as secretary to your mother.â
âDid my mother not wish him to be dismissed?â
He nodded.
âThen why? Could you not . . . ?â
âThis was the Bishop of London and the secretary was a Catholic. It is over. Your mother was not pleased. Nor was I. But . . . the people here . . . they are so much of one mind and they will listen to no other. Now, my dearest, let us have done with such talk. The fault was mine. Bishop Compton will come to you and he will make good little girls of you both. It is the Kingâs wish that he should come, and we must needs make the best of it.â
âBut you are unhappy.â
âOh, no . . . no.â
âYou said that we could be taken from you.â
âDid I? Let me tell you this . . . nothing, nothing on Earth will ever take my children from me.â
âBut . . .â
âI spoke rashly. I did not want this Compton fellow to be here, but I see now that he is a good man, a religious man. He will obey the Kingâs commands and make good Protestant young ladies of you. That is what the King wants and you know we must all obey the King. He says it is what the country wants and the country must see it being done. That is important. He is right. Charles is always right.â
âThen you are not unhappy?â
âAt this moment, with my dearest child, how could I be unhappy? You are to have a French tutor. You will like that. I believe you are interested in learning.â
âI like to know.â
âThat is good. And Anne?â
I was silent and my father laughed.
I went on: âShe does not care for books because they hurt her eyes.â
He frowned. âShe certainly has an affliction. Poor child. But she has a happy nature and we must keep it so.â
When he left me he had banished my fears.
I WAS LEARNING MORE of what was happening around us. There was always gossip among the attendants; the girls naturally heard it, and the elder ones, like Elizabeth Villiers and Sarah Jennings, understood what it was all about.
These two had taken a dislike to each other. Sarah, by this time, had complete domination over Anne, and my sister was hardly ever seen without her friend. It was not that Sarah was sycophantic. Far from it. There were times when one would have thought she was the mistress, and Anne the attendant.
I think Elizabeth Villiers resented her. She had not succeeded in forming that sort of alliance with me; and she probably recognized in Sarah one of her own kind. They were both ambitious and knew that to have one foot in a royal household was one step up the ladder to power.
They