distractions, pulled toward some magnetic force who stood waiting at my locker, his skin ashen, his head lowered. Was I imagining him here? Had Bradley Farrow really come to school after the death of his best friend?
I heard my name again from behind me, the word pulled and stretched.
âKâ¦aâ¦tâ¦eâ¦â
I turned this time, spinning in slow motion to find the source, and found Liam frozen at the end of the hallway, a sea of students shifting and flowing around him. It was just like all of my fantasies, and like in all of my fantasies, I knew our conversation was doomed. I gave him a sad wave, and when I turned, Maddie was a few feet away from me, her head lowered, her hands balled in fists. I hadnât thought about her, hadnât considered how the news of another studentâs death would impact Graceâs other best friend.
She raised her chin, and her eyes were puffy and red, but despite everything in our history, despite the fact that she was the only other person in the entire world who could even come close to understanding what it was like to lose Grace, I couldnât go to her. It was as though sheâd turned invisible, and I could see Bradley straight through her, his rich skin ashy and his golden eyes vacant.
âThatâs it?â Maddie whispered as I moved around her.
I had no idea why I was doing what I was doing or why I couldnât see her standing there, but she was right. That was it. Maddieâs eyes filled with tears, and she shook her head and rushed away. I donât know if I was still angry or if there was something inherently wrong with me, but I couldnât bring myself to follow. She fell into Sethâs arms at the end of the hallway, lowered her head on his shoulder, and I caught a flash of disappointment in his green eyes. Everyone hated me. I was losing them, letting the only people who truly cared about me go, and powerless to stop any of it. There was just something about Bradley Farrow.
A year ago, Bradley had been my first crush. A year ago, I would have given anything to see him standing in front of my locker. But things had changed since then. I didnât trust him. He didnât trust me. I wanted him. He pretended to want me. The whole thing was kind of a mess, but right now, none of it seemed to matter because Bradley Farrow was broken, and looking at him felt like looking in a mirror. His face had been rearranged by grief. He was still beautiful, but now he was more Picasso than Rembrandt, and I wanted nothing more than to slide his features back into place. To change him back into the Bradley he was before Alistair died.
âThis was no accident.â His voice was hoarse, urgent. âSomeone killed him, Kate.â He looked around the halls, ran his hand over his closely cropped hair.
âI know.â My words came out soft, soothing, and I didnât recognize my own voice. âI can help.â My fingers reached instinctively toward my neck and I tugged the pearls out from under my uniform shirt.
And I knew it was true. I could help. His face crumbled into something that looked like relief before rearranging itself back into the stark grief Iâd seen when my eyes first landed on him, and I knew Bradley Farrow was the reason I came to school today. Maybe if I could fix him, Iâd finally be able to fix myself.
Chapter 5
âHe called me thirty-two times.â Bradleyâs voice was barely above a whisper. âThirty-two times and I didnât answer one of them.â He turned away from me and swiped the backs of his hands over his eyes. âTheyâre saying it was a suicide. The truck driver said Alistair was speeding and he just blew right through the stop sign.â
I knew Alistair had died in a car accident, but I hadnât heard any of the details until now. The truth was, I didnât want to know the details. I didnât want any of this to be real. But it only took one look