school student in all of New York!
I liked the sound of it. Whatâs the point of pretending? To be honest, it felt fabulous. Can you imagine? People all over the city. Thousands. Maybe even millions. People I didnât even know. All of them knew who I was.
We talked a little more and then at the next corner, Avy headed in a different direction saying heâd catch us later. Nasim and I continued down the hall. If the hallway that morning had been something of an obstacle course, I wondered if it was about to become a minefield. Planted in the middle of the corridor directly in front of us, chatting amicably and pretending to be totally unaware that they were forcing everyone to go around them, was Shelby âThe Lionessâ Winston and her pride.
Weâve all seen enough teen movies and
Gossip Girl
to be familiar with Shelby. I suppose what truly puzzled me was how someone like her could go through life without realizing that she was the stereotypical rich, snotty, popular girl. So either she didnât see it in herself, or she saw it and had made a conscious decision that sheâd rather be rich, snotty, and popular than rich, snotty, and unpopular.
On the other hand, I have a feeling Shelby would be the first to point out that I also fit a familiar stereotypeâthe sort-of maybe sometimes semipopular, sort-of artsy, sort-of pretty, sort-of-just slightly pudgy, sort-of-always questioning, sort-of-uncertain-about-a-lot-of-things type who probably grows up to write the very books and movies about girls like Shelby that I just referred to.
But hereâs the truth. And I know some people will despise me for this, but Iâm just being as honest as I can possibly be. From the very instant that I learned
New York Weekly
was going to do a piece on me, I couldnât help wondering how one person in particular would react. I mean, here I was, living in one of the great power, money, and media capitals of the world. By now the story in
New York Weekly
had probably been read, and my picture seen, by millions of people, some of them incredibly importantâmovie stars who made their homes in New York, the mayor, probably someone on the New York Yankees, perhaps a senator or two, surely the odd Rockefeller and Clinton.
I knew
this kind of publicity is way bigger than high school.
I knew
that someday Iâd look back at Herrin and wonder how I could have possibly cared what anyone there thought. And yet, no matter how hard I tried, there was one person besides Nasim and Avy whose opinion was going to count. And that person was . . . Shelby Winston.
APRIL OF TENTH GRADE, ON THE TIJUANA TROLLEY
CANâT SAY IâM THRILLED ABOUT GOING BACK EAST AFTER I HAVE my calves done. Out here itâs so different. Everybody has cosmetic work. Everybody! Itâs like orthodontia. Had liposuction? Got a new nose? Chin? Some Botox? No one even blinks. Back in New York everyone has surgery too, but itâs all hush-hush. No one wants anyone to know. People disappear for a month and then reappear with a new nose and think no one will figure it out? Give me a break.
Some of the kids from Herrin probably wonât even recognize me, but some will, and people are bound to make comments, right? So who cares? Love me, love mynew look, okay? Besides, I am so past that high school scene. Those kids who still live with their parents, what do they know? Theyâre just tots.
But then there are my parents. Canât imagine what theyâll do when they see me. Not sure I want to imagine.
Even in Mexico calf implants ainât cheap. But there are ways to finance these things. Itâs kind of ironic, but those ways involve going across the border, too.
MARCH OF TENTH GRADE, FIRST DAY OF SPRING VACATION
N,
1st time in 1st class! The steward gave me Coke in a REAL glass before we even backed from the gate!
First it was me and Actor Man wearing a silver gray suit. Iâm sure Iâve seen him on TV.