Mr. Hynde Is Out of His Mind! Read Online Free Page A

football.”
    Ryan is weird.
    Finally the night of the big showarrived. Everybody was dressed up in his or her costume. We peeked through the curtains in the multipurpose room and saw all the parents were there. I was nervous. Mr. Hynde told us everything was going to be fine.
    We were waiting for the curtain to open when Andrea pulled me aside.
    â€œA.J.,” she said, “I want you to know that just because we have to kiss each other doesn’t mean I like you.”
    â€œI don’t like you, either,” I said.
    â€œGood,” she said. “I’m glad we agree on something.”
    â€œKissing girls is gross,” I told her.
    â€œKissing boys is gross too,” she said. “Ieven went to Mr. Hynde and told him I didn’t want to be in the play because I didn’t want to kiss you.”
    â€œSo did I!”
    â€œHe told me I should pretend that you’re something I really like,” Andrea said.
    â€œThat’s what he told me!” I said. “I’m going to pretend you’re a dirt bike.”
    â€œI’m going to pretend you’re an encyclopedia,” Andrea said.
    â€œFine.”
    So we did the play. I remembered all my lines, and locking Andrea in the dungeon was fun. Everything was going great.
    But the whole time, in the back of my mind, I was thinking that soon I would have to kiss Andrea. It was a horrible thought.
    We were a minute away from the big kissing part. The whole cast was up on the stage.
    Andrea was standing right next to me. I was really nervous.
    Michael leaned over and whispered in my ear. “Remember, she’s a dirt bike,” he said.
    Emily leaned over and whispered to Andrea. “Remember, he’s an encyclopedia,” she said.
    And then, before I could catch mybreath, it was time. The big moment. The kiss.
    I leaned over toward Andrea.
    Andrea leaned over toward me.
    My heart was beating fast. I closed my eyes.

    Dirt bike. Dirt bike. Dirt bike. Dirt bike.
    I was trying really hard to pretend that Andrea was a dirt bike.
    And at that very moment, the most amazing thing in thehistory of the world happened.
    Andrea didn’t kiss me.
    I opened my eyes. Andrea had stepped up to the microphone at the front of the stage.
    She started singing!

    â€œâ€˜The sun will come out tomorrow…’” she sang.
    She was singing that dumb stick-out-your-chin-and-grin song from that Annie movie! It wasn’t even in the script!
    â€œâ€˜Tomorrow! Tomorrow! I love youtomorrow…’”
    It was horrible and all, but it was still the greatest moment in my life because at least I didn’t have to kiss Andrea.
    All the parents were smiling and nodding their heads. When Andrea finished singing the dumb song, they all went crazy, clapping and cheering and whistling and stamping their feet. Andrea bowed, and the play was over.
    â€œI’m sorry, A.J.,” Andrea said to me during the standing ovation. “I just couldn’t do it. I was afraid that if I kissed you, I might throw up.”
    â€œThanks,” I said. “Me too.”
    Andrea gave me a hug.
    â€œOooooh!” Ryan said, “A.J. and Andrea are in love !”
    The audience was still clapping when we noticed Mr. Hynde at the side of the stage behind the curtain. He was crying!
    We all ran over to him. Tears were streaming down his cheeks. I figured Mr. Hynde was upset because Andrea messed up his hip-hop play.

    â€œWhat’s wrong, Mr. Hynde?” Emily asked.
    â€œWhat was that song?” he asked, wiping the tearswith his sleeve.
    â€œIt’s called ‘Tomorrow,’” Andrea said. “It’s from Annie .”
    â€œIt’s the most beautiful song I ever heard,” Mr. Hynde said. And then he started crying again.
    Mr. Hynde is weird.

9
TV, at Last
    We were supposed to have music on Monday, but Mr. Hynde was absent. We were kind of worried. Maybe he was sick, or maybe a meteor hit his house