Sebastian Darke: Prince of Fools Read Online Free Page B

opportunity to visit it?'
     
'We've never heard of it,' said Max bluntly.
     
Cornelius chose to ignore the remark. He sat back and smiled. 'Oh, it is a fine and prosperous place. I enlisted in the army there as a young man of eighteen summers and steadily worked my way through the ranks to the post of Captain. I had a fine regiment of men under me and together we fought many epic battles against the neighbouring kingdom of Tannis. My men were willing to put their lives at my command and I was ready to give mine for them. I don't believe there was a happier man in all of Golmira.'
     
There was a long silence, during which Sebastian became aware of the chirruping of insects in the bushes behind them.
     
Then Max said, 'So what went wrong?'
     
'Who said anything did?' snarled Cornelius.
     
'Well, nobody. But if everything was so wonderful in Golmira, why are you headed for Keladon?'
     
Cornelius's face darkened and he glared into his mug of coffee. 'Because something happened,' he said. 'Something . . . stupid.'
     
Sebastian and Max waited patiently to hear what it was. Finally Max had to prompt Cornelius.
     
'Please feel free to share it with us.'
     
'Some . . . meddling pen-pusher . . . some blithering jumped-up idiot . . . pushed through a proclamation stating that every enlisted man in the queen's army had to be . . .'
     
'Yes?' said Sebastian.
     
'. . . had to be . . . well, of a certain height.'
     
'Oh,' said Max and Sebastian together.
     
Cornelius sat there staring into his coffee mug as though he might find an answer to his troubles in those dark brown depths. It was clear to Sebastian that the little man was fighting with a conflict within himself. Clearly he didn't really want to talk about this; at the same time, he quite obviously needed to discuss it with someone.
     
'I mean, it was ridiculous! My exploits spoke for them?selves. I had slain more of the enemy than my entire detachment put together. Nobody was a better fighter, nobody had the skill with a sword that I had. But I was confounded! I even appealed to the queen in person, asking her to exempt me from this ridiculous ruling.' Cornelius sighed. 'It was to no avail. She spoke to me in private and told me that since she had signed the papers that made the ruling law, then there was nothing she could do. She could not rescind the order. I simply had to leave. But where would I go?'
     
Max opened his mouth to say, 'Keladon,' but Sebastian gave him a look which made him abandon the idea.
     
'Where indeed?' agreed Sebastian, in a sympathetic tone.
     
'And then one of my men told me about Keladon. He said it had the most powerful army in history, including a special unit called the Crimson Cloak – bodyguards to King Septimus himself! This most celebrated of units is made up of volunteer soldiers from all over the known world. A unit with its own rules, its own laws – and, so far as this man was aware, no height restrictions. I resolved that I would be a part of it. So I set off from Golmira four moons ago, and now here I am, sitting at a campfire and about to have dinner with you two.'
     
'Small world,' said Sebastian. Then he winced. 'Sorry,' he said. 'No offence.'
     
'None taken, my friend.' Cornelius seemed to make an effort to shrug off his bad memories. 'Anyway, that's enough about me. I see that javralat is still a long way from being cooked, so why not give me a sample of your jester's skills? I could certainly use a good laugh after my recent experiences!'
     
Sebastian and Max exchanged worried glances.
     
'A good laugh,' said Max quietly. 'Yes, well, that would be a novelty.'
     
'Hmm. Let me see now . . .' Sebastian thought for a moment, leafing through the imaginary book of jests that he kept stored in his head. Finally he made a selection.
     
'A man is standing by a river eating a pie. Another man comes along with a little mutt on a lead and the mutt starts to jump up at the first man, after a bit of pie. So the first man