Tales of Accidental Genius Read Online Free Page A

they?”
    â€œThey’re an indication of how clean everything is.”
    â€œIs it important?”
    â€œVery. High levels of dopamine will lessen the healing qualities of each pea.”
    The old man just stood there. “I’m sorry now that I ever doubted your expertise.”
    â€œIt’s a test I recommend conducting at this stage,” Akin went on. “But without my instruments, I’m going to need a piece of silver.”
    The old man thought for a moment. “Probably in the bedroom.”
    When he was out of sight, Akin took the tank lid completely off, then rummaged through his backpack for the container marked LIVE FISH that he had picked up on returning to the shop.
    When he heard the old man coming back, Akin shouted that it was gold, and not silver he needed. The old man grunted and turned around. Akin poured the contents of the plastic container into the tank, then quietly put the lid back on.
    â€œWill bronze work?” came a voice from the bedroom. Akin replied that bronze was even better, and the old man returned with the miniature statue of an elephant.
    Akin told the old man to get more peas ready, then raised the tank lid and dipped the elephant’s trunk in, just below the surface of the water.
    The old man watched.
    â€œWow,” Akin said. “These readings are hard to believe.” Then he turned to the old man. “This water is so clean, the dopamine level ain’t even registering.”
    â€œScrubbed clean every Sunday,” the old man assured him. “Rain or shine.”
    Akin tried to imagine how his mother might break it to the old man, if he were a child, like his younger brother, Sam.
    â€œBefore we go back to the peas,” Akin said. “There’s bad news and there’s good news.”
    The old man’s lower lip began to shake, and Akin could see how he might have looked as a boy.
    â€œWhich would you like first?” Akin asked. “Good news or bad news?”
    The old man glanced at the cabinet of ceramic figures, then at the photographs on his mantelpiece, at faces once capable of moving and making sounds. They were people who had known him the way he remembered himself. The woman in the largest picture had been his wife. Sometimes it felt like she was just out shopping, or on the other side of a door about to come in.
    â€œThe good,” he said finally. “because I’m an optimist at heart.”
    Akin took a deep breath.
    â€œWell . . . the truth is—it wasn’t constipation or Piper’s bladder.”
    â€œNot his bladder?”
    â€œPiper was pregnant.”
    For a few moments, the old man’s expression did not change, as though words ceased to have any meaning.
    â€œWith twins,” Akin said, pointing to two tiny new fish darting excitedly around the tank.
    The old man moved his head as close to the glass as possible.
    â€œCongratulations,” Akin told him. “You’re a grandfather.”
    The old man couldn’t believe it. “All these years I thought Piper was a young chap!”
    The tiny fish were unstoppable, flapping their bodies through the legs of a plastic deep-sea diver.
    â€œAnd they’ve been in here all this time?”
    Akin nodded.
    â€œTells you how bad my eyes are!”
    When Akin explained that Piper had most likely died in childbirth some time ago, the old man had to sit down. Akin found some instant cocoa in the cupboard, then filled a kettle and bashed the cocoa with a spoon until it broke into chunks.
    The old man went into detail about Piper as a young fish. Then he got up and stood over the tank, where his grandfish were scooting through Piper’s old castle and fake plants.
    â€œThey’re the spitting image of him,” the old man said.
    â€œAnd fish live longer when they have company.”
    When the reality of Piper’s loss began to sink in, Akin put his hand on the old man’s shoulder. “Loads of