Secrets of a D-List Supervillain Read Online Free Page A

the rest of the team put together... except for Kimodo, but she was a traitor, so it qualified my statement.
    “Swamp Lord thinks the dinosaur you fought is the head of this parish’s fire department, a super named Voss. Have you seen her? Swamp Lord should be rolling up here in an ambulance in a few minutes.”
    “What’s he doing here?” Sheila asked, ignoring my question.
    “He was turned into one of the dinosaurs we fought. The T-Rex you were going to end up mating with was none other than Bobby Walton. How come you never mentioned you were his cousin?”
    It was a well-documented fact that my mouth has a tendency to get me in trouble. The look on her face told me that this was one of those times.
    “Where is that no good piece of shit?”
    “Gone,” I answered. Why do I even try talking to her?
    “You let him get away!”
    “Just a second ago you were saying how useless I am without my armor. Exactly how was I supposed to detain someone like him? Tell him amusing stories? Dazzle him with witty banter?”
    “You used to work with him,” she growled, as I noted that if she pulled that gauze any tighter, it would either rip or crack her poor patient’s skull.
    “And now I work with you. The only difference I see is that Bobby never led me into a trap where I was almost killed. You, on the other hand, did it tonight, and don’t think I haven’t forgotten about your part in Patterson’s little ambush, Sheila.”
    “You know damned well I didn’t know anything about that!” Dozer was angry that her leadership skills almost killed us all tonight. It might be wrong to push that button, but the way I saw it was I could see her guilt and insecurity, and raise her three destroyed sets of custom crafted powered armor and a statue of Andydroid.
    Poor Andy was petrified, just like my gear. Both the Bugler’s legs were broken. Sanford’s containment suit was in tatters after Rex transformed him into a velociraptor, and he was leaking his paralyzing juice all over the place.
    Not exactly one of our most stellar outings, even if we did sort of win.
    “Yeah, I know. I’m also looking around and seeing what happens when you do know something. Makes me think ignorance is actually bliss.”
    “Get out of my sight, Stringel! Don’t let me catch you helping my cousin out, either.”
    “Nothing would make me happier, fearless leader. And don’t worry, if I do help Bobby out, I’ll be sure to make certain you can’t catch me.”
    My statement might have been too harsh, but only because it was true.
    My mom used to keep all my report cards; she probably burned them after our falling out, but I did recall reading my first grade one where it said I had problems “Playing well with others.”
    Not much had changed.
    • • •
    Wearing a borrowed set of coveralls from the ambulance Swamp Lord provided, I’d been pressed into EMT duty and my patient was none other than Bo Carr—the Biloxi Bugler. In my zeal to help the man with two broken legs, I might’ve given him a bit too much painkiller, because he became kind of giddy and chatty. In my pocket was the magic necklace that allowed Bo to assume a man-bat form. All the doohickey did for me was let me read and understand languages.
    It was just another way to ruin my night.
    “You should probably try and get some rest, Bugler,” I said, and then asked the woman driving the ambulance how far we were from the nearest hospital.
    Her answer didn’t exactly fill me with joy.
    “We’ll get there when we get there,” Bo said.
    “Do you need anything?” I offered, and held up a small pillow. “This?”
    “Nah,” the older man said, and gave me the thumbs up gesture. “I’ll bounce back in no time. It takes more than this to keep a good man down. Heck, I remember when you hurt me worse.”
    Naturally, he was right about me putting him in the hospital back in the day. I’d broken several of his ribs and forced him to hang up the spandex until the bugs showed